Tsue ~ That's What She Said: Take The Edge Off Your Day With Humor ~ 25 Adult Truths

Monday, August 8, 2011

Take The Edge Off Your Day With Humor ~ 25 Adult Truths

Having one of those days? I am.

Earlier today, I received an SOS text from my school parent network about an emergency School Board Meeting. Oh, lovely. It seems every day, there is just more outrageous, bad budget news.

This particular text set me off ~ giggling. I giggled all day.
As soon as I thought I had my fits of humor squelched, another more ludicrous thought would come to mind.

So giggling, to the point of crying, I went through my day, with no hope, whatsoever, of taking anything seriously!

"School Board Meeting tonight at 7pm - we need everyone to come and support the high school principal in his effort to save his job!"

Seriously? (You can imagine the look on my face) The budget crisis is so bad now that we are just going to "roll" this year without a high school principal? Ahhh, what did he actually do anyway? We don't need him!

For that matter, the students have books, don't they? Who needs teachers?
We'll just keep a custodian and a cafeteria worker on staff.

Oh, to heck with that.
We'll just give each student a book,
a roll of toilet paper,
a jar of peanut butter
and slap them on the back and wish them good luck.

In all seriousness, if you are fortunate enough to reside in a region, state or school district that is not currently under a crippling budget crisis, thank your lucky stars, dig your heels in and don't move anywhere!

While you are thanking your lucky stars, I challenge you to come up with a use for your tax dollars that is not as important as funding education. If you can't, please reach out to your local, state and national representatives and tell them so! (If you are in a educational budget challenged area, for pete's sake stop reading this and go shoot off some strongly worded emails!)

In truth, I must admit that the emergency meeting and situation with the high school principal is apparently not budget related. However, what a sad state of affairs that my initial assumption led me to that conclusion.

After arriving home from the emergency meeting, I found a wonderful surprise in my inbox. A humorous collection of "Adult Truths", author unknown, forwarded by my younger sister. It was just what I needed to get me right back into giggling mode again.

~ 25 Adult Truths ~

1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.
2. Nothing is worse than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.
3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.
4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.
5. How the heck are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
6. Was learning cursive really necessary?
7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on # 5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.
8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.
9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.
10. Bad decisions make good stories.
11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.
12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection...again.
13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page technical report that I swear I did not make any changes to.
14. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know no tto answer when they call.
15. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.
16. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night, more kisses begin with Miller Lite than Kay.
17. I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.
18. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.
19. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?
20. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters!
21. Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever..
22. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.
23. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I'd bet everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time.
24. People who forward e- mails without deleting the tons of previous recipients should be shot and then tarred and feathered.
25. The first testicular guard, the "Cup," was used in Hockey in 1874and the first helmet was used in 1974. That means it only took 100years for men to realize that their brain is also important. Ladies quit laughing!
Thank you, author unknown, for brightening my day with humor.


Anonymous said...

OMG! I am laughing so hard, I have tears rolling down my face!! THANK YOU!!

Emmi said...

thanks for the laugh!

Anonymous said...

Ha ha! The last one is just too much :D

turq said...

Loved this.. Really liked 2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when yourealize you're wrong. LOL
I've had that happen.. and yep it sucks..lol

turq said...

Thank You for making me smile..I needed that!
I hope you have a Wonderful Day too!

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